Realisation

These last few days have been pretty eventful.
Last night was my first ever night on my own at home, and I actually managed it. I am used to days on my own, well afternoons etc after school and days from school holidays but still: I managed to not stay awake all night thinking someone will break in, I managed to get my Grandad (when he came down) and I fed, I managed to sort the pets, get to bed and get up on time for work. It may not seem like much, but I was responsible for the first time on my own for animals and the house and it was ok :)
I got to work half an hour early, and went into new look. No one else was in there, so I decided to look in the inspire section. I realised they have such nice clothes in there, and just because I am big, it doesn't mean I can't dress feminine. If I am honest, it installed a little bit of confidence in me, I still hate the body I am stuck in, but I know there are clothes I can fit in where my size is the lowest, and they feel so much nicer. Sure, there isn't a huge selection, as lets be honest, I am not a size 8/10/12 and probably never will be. But, I know there are clothes, not many but still, they are there that are "in fashion" as so to speak that are designed for larger bodies, it feels a bit better :)

Work was ok, had a bit of a joke, I am starting to come out of my shell a little bit :) it is still very hard work, and draining but it is money, and I feel good knowing I am doing something productive. Since I have been home I have put some washing on, loaded and emptied the dishwasher, and re loaded, sorted the chinchilla and now sitting down :)

Not gonna lie, I am looking forward to people coming home, but it was nice to be alone for a night just to experience it, and I don't think it would be a lie to say I would be prepared to do it again tonight if I was put in that situation :)

Today was a good day =D